We have been ma'ams for four days... Since Saturday.
I don't know how the others feel, but I feel good each time my juniors greeted me.
I try to acknowledge them in a friendly manner. Jan was with me when E greeted me outside the home economics kitchen. I returned a 'Hi', and Jan was like saying that I shouldn't be so nice. Why shouldn't I? She told me to be strict. Hmmm... Don't think that I wanna do that right now. Not unless I had to resort to strictness.
It's kinda weird to be the in-charge now. Overlooking training sessions. Talking to Mdm Lum about training schedules, etc. It seems weird all because Sec 4 ma'ams are no longer attending any of these activities that we have. 'We are now all alone. The ma'ams are gone.', LJ. I miss them. But gathering and parting is part of life. We have to accept that.
Lots of tests are coming soon... Tests are scheduled all the way to week 8 if I'm not wrong. So overwhelming. I have no confidence in all the tests. Especially for Lit 12th Night and Chemistry. Guess I'm dead meat.
Right now the taste of blood still lingers in my throat. I don't know why. I've not eaten anything bloody. But the taste of blood just seem to be there since the very first second when I took the sheep heart out of the plastic bag. It's muscular. Firm. No wonder why one's emotion could be so strong, because the heart is strong. It has solid fats on it. Imagine those fats in your artery. No wonder you'll die. Poke our fingers into the artery, veins etc. and feel where it leads. It's pretty fun to cut the heart open and see the structure of it. Valves, heartstrings... The heartstrings are really strong. Even if you hold the thinnest one, it could bear the weight of the entire heart. Heex. Teacher said that I've cut very nicely. Hmmm.... Maybe I should consider being a surgeon. Aunt had told me to study to be a doctor. But nope. I'm not going to do that. I may go into medical field but not a doctor. Anyway it's still too early to talk about such things... No one knows the future...
XL asked me out to watch Brotherhood with her. Gladly I agreed. Have been longing to watch that. But aunt not interested, most friends not allowed to watch. Am really happy that she asked me to watch it with her. But I don't know how to ask for permission to go. I'll just go without letting her know. If I were to ask, she won't allow, unless it's after exam period.
I'm still pounding over how to tell her that I have to attend Sec 4 ma'ams POC, my CRD this Sat. It's from 1 to 8pm. So long. Furthermore it's till so late. Wonder how's the programme like. If only it's not so long then maybe it would be easier for me to get consent. Haiz... But hey! I get to see so many people who belonged to the happy momeries of ULP. Sadly those involved in NDP are not allowed to go. Voone is leaving me there alone...